i dreamed my uterus began to hemmorhage while misha and i were hiking through this big golden field. it happened so quickly. i went from being mildly embarassed about the gush of blood from between my legs to totally lightheaded and dizzy and fainting in an instant. i fell first to my knees, then laid quietly down on my side and started to silently weep. misha was clutching my hand, both our fists bloody, calling out for help into his cell phone, but i was dying. i closed my eyes. it got dark.

then i dreamed i snuck into my neighbour's basement and found a small airplane that would fit one person. i hauled it outside and up onto the roof and started it up, not really believing i was going to do this. i climbed in with the engine revving. it was present day, it was snowing, i wanted to fly through the night snow and look at xmas lights on people's houses. i got a few blocks and became afraid of how high, and alone, i was. i turned the plane back and was overcome with exhaustion much like i have been in the last week and started to fall asleep at the wheel. i woke up after i had crashed the little plane right outside the neighbour's door. they started to come out, and i had to struggle and stumble up out of the plane quickly so that they wouldn't see me in it, and i wouldn't be held accountable for all the damage i did. i tried to struggle into the house but misha had filled the entire outdoor walkway and front hall with all manner of bright xmas decorations and lights and music and i was tripping on cords and neon santas. i finally stumbled through and into the living room and fell onto the couch to sleep, while i heard the neighbour shout about the plane. i felt ok, though, like i knew i'd gotten away with it.